Sermon 20th March 2011
Today, our Curate, Gill Tayleur, continues our study of The Purpose Driven Life by Rick Warren.
FORMED FOR GOD’S FAMILY 20 MARCH 2011 EPH 3:14-21
Three members of a church are in a boat far out to sea. They decide they are going to confess their sins to each another.
One asks another, 'What is something that you have a problem with?'
The first church member says, 'Well, I have a problem with alcohol. I drink far too much. I can’t get through the day without it.'
The second one says, 'Well, I have a problem with lust. I desire every young woman I see.'
One of the others asks the third church member, 'Well, what is something that you have a problem with?'
The third man replies, 'Gossip, and I can't wait to get back to shore!'
... ... ...
In that wonderful prayer we just heard from Paul’s letter to the church in Ephesus, Paul prays that they would be strong in faith and really know the hugeness of God’s love. How high and deep, how broad and long it is.
And the interesting thing is that he prays it for them, not just as individuals, but together.
Together as God’s people.
We are God’s people, together, too.
Our ‘togetherness’ is what we’re looking at today, as the 2nd of our life purposes described by Rick Warren. In his book, our Lent book, the Purpose Driven Life, Rick suggests that we are Formed for God’s Family. Formed for God’s family. He says we are called to belong, not just to believe.
I should think lots of us consider ourselves to belong to this church. And for many of us, it’s a belonging to a church family.
When we chose to believe, when we start to follow Jesus,
God becomes our father and we become his child in a special way. And other Christians become our brothers and sisters; the church becomes our spiritual family. Family relationships, as we all know, can be very tricky! Family relationships are often characterised by deep love and commitment, but also real tensions and issues! And the church family can be much the same.
This morning I’m hoping to enthuse us all with the wonderful picture that the Bible gives of how church family relationships might be, at their best. And I’m hoping to challenge us all to deal with the ways in which our relationships are not their best, and to take steps to make them better.
So, we’re formed for God’s family. How should that family get on?
In the New Testament, there are over 50 times when the phrase, “one another” is used. We are commanded to love one another, pray for one another, encourage one another, reproach one another, greet one another, serve one another, teach one another, accept one another, honour one another, bear one another’s burdens, forgive one another, submit to one another, be devoted to one another, laugh and cry with one another, and have many other mutual responsibilities. This is how we’re meant to treat one another! It’s tremendous! All that mutual love and support! And it’s tremendously difficult. Because our relationships are with REAL people, not IDEAL people.
And real people are sometimes difficult, annoying, frustrating and imperfect. Like you and me. They irritate us, they wind us up the wrong way, they let us down, and they hurt us. Like you and I do.
So, how do we build the sort of loving relationships those “one another” phrases describe, with real not ideal people?
First we have to spend time together! Not just over a coffee after church, although that’s a good place to start. Many of us do stay on for a drink, although of course there are reasons why some can’t. If that’s not something you often do, maybe today, or sometime soon, you could do so. And if you do usually stay, how about speaking to someone you haven’t before, or not for a long while? It’s not just about catching up with friends, although that’s part of it. It’s also about looking out for one another and caring for one another, including those on the fringes. Or those who are different from us – in age, for example. The night before his death, Jesus told his followers that they’d be known by the love they’d have for one another. When we come together, as we do, from different backgrounds and races, it’s a challenge to really connect across those differences sometimes, but it’s important that we do.
So, church family relationships start here on a Sunday morning, but in order to build the sort of loving ‘one another’ relationships we’re thinking of, a chat after church isn’t likely to be enough. Are there people in the church family that you see outside of Sunday morning? Perhaps, a few, who live nearby? Or maybe those who go to one of the small groups we have here in the parish. I realise that not everyone would be able to get to one, but let me remind you we have 7 small groups, of people who meet together weekly or fortnightly. Some meet in the day, some in the evening, and one with childcare for toddlers.
The groups are a great way to get to know a few people better, and be able to give and receive the sort of care and support we heard in those ‘one another’ phrases. Ask me or Cameron more about them after the service.
So our church family relationships, like any family relationships, need time and attention. They also need to be real. By which I mean there’s a time and a place for being open and really honest with one another. Sharing our hurts, revealing our hopes and fears, confessing our failures, admitting our doubts and our weaknesses, asking for help and prayer. That sounds difficult, risky or scary? Yes it can be hard, but being honest and learning to trust one another is essential if we’re to really care for one another, support and encourage one another effectively.
Which brings me to the next aspect of ‘one another’ relationships. They’re to be mutual. Two way. This is about giving and receiving! We all like to be independent, don’t we? But as God’s family we’re designed to be dependent on one another. The Bible uses the picture of a body: we are all like different parts of one body. And the eye can’t say to the hand, I don’t need you! Or a head to the feet, I don’t need you! We are designed to need one another. That’s how we work best together and become what God has made us to be. Formed for God’s family.
Of course there may be particular times in our lives when we need to give more, and times to receive more. At times we’re to rejoice with one another, at other times to weep with one another, and to carry one another’s burdens. It will depend on what we’re each going through, but such support and care is to be mutual.
So, formed for God’s family, we’re to spend time with one another, be real with one another, mutually caring and supporting one another. That sounds pretty attractive to me, on both the giving and receiving ends! But let’s face it, it’s not always like that. And so perhaps it’s not surprising, that another ‘one another’ we’re commanded to do, is to forgive one another, bear with one another and accept one another.
I suspect we need to bear with one another, and forgive one another more often than we care to admit. Because we are all imperfect, selfish, needy, irritating people! We’re sinners! With faults that rub others up the wrong way. I can be bossy, convinced I’m right and you’re wrong, and totally caught up in my own perspective, wants and needs. And so can you! And so of course we infuriate one another, disappoint one another and hurt one another. And the closer we get, the more we’ll do so! Well, isn’t that how it works in families?! But – learning to forgive is really important. Jesus told his followers to forgive one another as God forgives us. So here, in God’s family, this should be a place where we see forgiveness and grace flowing between each other all the time, because together we’re children of our great Forgiving Father God. Remember how much he has forgiven us, me!
We all need forgiveness and mercy, because we all stumble and fall. Sometimes we need help to recognise that, and sometimes the most loving thing we can do is to very gently draw someone’s attention to their sin or shortcomings. But only if we do so in mercy, forgiveness and love, and help them get back on track. Would we dare to do that?
And that brings me to the last aspect of church family relationships I’d like to highlight – unity. We’re not to criticise, not to gossip, not judge. We’re to be realistic in our expectations, and focus on what we have in common, not our differences. We’re to build up the unity of God’s family. The man in the boat in my joke wasn’t exactly going to build unity if he gossiped when he got home! It can be so damaging, destroying trust and openness at a stroke. Instead let’s make sure the things we say build one another up, individually and together.
Well there’s plenty more that could be said about relationships within the church, including unity, on the wider scale. We’ve not time to address those as well right now, but I think some of the same principles apply.
Before I wrap up this taster of how our church family relationships might be – of course many of you will read more about all this when we get to days 15 to 21 in the Purpose Driven Life – I’d like to recognise how there are many ways in which this church family does already have a lot of the sort of loving relationships we’ve been thinking about. I’m not suggesting we’re starting from scratch! But there are probably some of us who aren’t plugged in to these sorts of relationships, giving or receiving. There are probably some of us who aren’t in real, honest relationships, who aren’t being the part of the body they might. And I dare say there are some of us who need to forgive, or be forgiven. Let’s hear that list of ‘one another’s again, and listen out for what we might need to do in response.
“Love one another, pray for one another, encourage one another, reproach one another, greet one another, serve one another, teach one another, accept one another, honour one another, bear one another’s burdens, forgive one another, submit to one another, be devoted to one another, laugh and cry with one another.”
So, do these ideas about how our relationships might be, within God’s family, make you excited or daunted? Maybe both!
Our Ephesians reading, about being strong in faith and knowing the hugeness of God’s love, TOGETHER as his people, ends with some wonderful encouragement.
St Paul says,
“[God] is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to his power that is at work within us!”
Living in the loving ‘one another’ relationships we’ve been thinking about this morning, is tremendous, and tremendously difficult. BUT God’s power – remember, the same power that raised Jesus from the dead! – is at work IN US, to do more than we can ask or imagine! How wonderful! It’s possible! God can do it! And so let’s pray...
FORMED FOR GOD’S FAMILY 20 MARCH 2011 EPH 3:14-21
Three members of a church are in a boat far out to sea. They decide they are going to confess their sins to each another.
One asks another, 'What is something that you have a problem with?'
The first church member says, 'Well, I have a problem with alcohol. I drink far too much. I can’t get through the day without it.'
The second one says, 'Well, I have a problem with lust. I desire every young woman I see.'
One of the others asks the third church member, 'Well, what is something that you have a problem with?'
The third man replies, 'Gossip, and I can't wait to get back to shore!'
... ... ...
In that wonderful prayer we just heard from Paul’s letter to the church in Ephesus, Paul prays that they would be strong in faith and really know the hugeness of God’s love. How high and deep, how broad and long it is.
And the interesting thing is that he prays it for them, not just as individuals, but together.
Together as God’s people.
We are God’s people, together, too.
Our ‘togetherness’ is what we’re looking at today, as the 2nd of our life purposes described by Rick Warren. In his book, our Lent book, the Purpose Driven Life, Rick suggests that we are Formed for God’s Family. Formed for God’s family. He says we are called to belong, not just to believe.
I should think lots of us consider ourselves to belong to this church. And for many of us, it’s a belonging to a church family.
When we chose to believe, when we start to follow Jesus,
God becomes our father and we become his child in a special way. And other Christians become our brothers and sisters; the church becomes our spiritual family. Family relationships, as we all know, can be very tricky! Family relationships are often characterised by deep love and commitment, but also real tensions and issues! And the church family can be much the same.
This morning I’m hoping to enthuse us all with the wonderful picture that the Bible gives of how church family relationships might be, at their best. And I’m hoping to challenge us all to deal with the ways in which our relationships are not their best, and to take steps to make them better.
So, we’re formed for God’s family. How should that family get on?
In the New Testament, there are over 50 times when the phrase, “one another” is used. We are commanded to love one another, pray for one another, encourage one another, reproach one another, greet one another, serve one another, teach one another, accept one another, honour one another, bear one another’s burdens, forgive one another, submit to one another, be devoted to one another, laugh and cry with one another, and have many other mutual responsibilities. This is how we’re meant to treat one another! It’s tremendous! All that mutual love and support! And it’s tremendously difficult. Because our relationships are with REAL people, not IDEAL people.
And real people are sometimes difficult, annoying, frustrating and imperfect. Like you and me. They irritate us, they wind us up the wrong way, they let us down, and they hurt us. Like you and I do.
So, how do we build the sort of loving relationships those “one another” phrases describe, with real not ideal people?
First we have to spend time together! Not just over a coffee after church, although that’s a good place to start. Many of us do stay on for a drink, although of course there are reasons why some can’t. If that’s not something you often do, maybe today, or sometime soon, you could do so. And if you do usually stay, how about speaking to someone you haven’t before, or not for a long while? It’s not just about catching up with friends, although that’s part of it. It’s also about looking out for one another and caring for one another, including those on the fringes. Or those who are different from us – in age, for example. The night before his death, Jesus told his followers that they’d be known by the love they’d have for one another. When we come together, as we do, from different backgrounds and races, it’s a challenge to really connect across those differences sometimes, but it’s important that we do.
So, church family relationships start here on a Sunday morning, but in order to build the sort of loving ‘one another’ relationships we’re thinking of, a chat after church isn’t likely to be enough. Are there people in the church family that you see outside of Sunday morning? Perhaps, a few, who live nearby? Or maybe those who go to one of the small groups we have here in the parish. I realise that not everyone would be able to get to one, but let me remind you we have 7 small groups, of people who meet together weekly or fortnightly. Some meet in the day, some in the evening, and one with childcare for toddlers.
The groups are a great way to get to know a few people better, and be able to give and receive the sort of care and support we heard in those ‘one another’ phrases. Ask me or Cameron more about them after the service.
So our church family relationships, like any family relationships, need time and attention. They also need to be real. By which I mean there’s a time and a place for being open and really honest with one another. Sharing our hurts, revealing our hopes and fears, confessing our failures, admitting our doubts and our weaknesses, asking for help and prayer. That sounds difficult, risky or scary? Yes it can be hard, but being honest and learning to trust one another is essential if we’re to really care for one another, support and encourage one another effectively.
Which brings me to the next aspect of ‘one another’ relationships. They’re to be mutual. Two way. This is about giving and receiving! We all like to be independent, don’t we? But as God’s family we’re designed to be dependent on one another. The Bible uses the picture of a body: we are all like different parts of one body. And the eye can’t say to the hand, I don’t need you! Or a head to the feet, I don’t need you! We are designed to need one another. That’s how we work best together and become what God has made us to be. Formed for God’s family.
Of course there may be particular times in our lives when we need to give more, and times to receive more. At times we’re to rejoice with one another, at other times to weep with one another, and to carry one another’s burdens. It will depend on what we’re each going through, but such support and care is to be mutual.
So, formed for God’s family, we’re to spend time with one another, be real with one another, mutually caring and supporting one another. That sounds pretty attractive to me, on both the giving and receiving ends! But let’s face it, it’s not always like that. And so perhaps it’s not surprising, that another ‘one another’ we’re commanded to do, is to forgive one another, bear with one another and accept one another.
I suspect we need to bear with one another, and forgive one another more often than we care to admit. Because we are all imperfect, selfish, needy, irritating people! We’re sinners! With faults that rub others up the wrong way. I can be bossy, convinced I’m right and you’re wrong, and totally caught up in my own perspective, wants and needs. And so can you! And so of course we infuriate one another, disappoint one another and hurt one another. And the closer we get, the more we’ll do so! Well, isn’t that how it works in families?! But – learning to forgive is really important. Jesus told his followers to forgive one another as God forgives us. So here, in God’s family, this should be a place where we see forgiveness and grace flowing between each other all the time, because together we’re children of our great Forgiving Father God. Remember how much he has forgiven us, me!
We all need forgiveness and mercy, because we all stumble and fall. Sometimes we need help to recognise that, and sometimes the most loving thing we can do is to very gently draw someone’s attention to their sin or shortcomings. But only if we do so in mercy, forgiveness and love, and help them get back on track. Would we dare to do that?
And that brings me to the last aspect of church family relationships I’d like to highlight – unity. We’re not to criticise, not to gossip, not judge. We’re to be realistic in our expectations, and focus on what we have in common, not our differences. We’re to build up the unity of God’s family. The man in the boat in my joke wasn’t exactly going to build unity if he gossiped when he got home! It can be so damaging, destroying trust and openness at a stroke. Instead let’s make sure the things we say build one another up, individually and together.
Well there’s plenty more that could be said about relationships within the church, including unity, on the wider scale. We’ve not time to address those as well right now, but I think some of the same principles apply.
Before I wrap up this taster of how our church family relationships might be – of course many of you will read more about all this when we get to days 15 to 21 in the Purpose Driven Life – I’d like to recognise how there are many ways in which this church family does already have a lot of the sort of loving relationships we’ve been thinking about. I’m not suggesting we’re starting from scratch! But there are probably some of us who aren’t plugged in to these sorts of relationships, giving or receiving. There are probably some of us who aren’t in real, honest relationships, who aren’t being the part of the body they might. And I dare say there are some of us who need to forgive, or be forgiven. Let’s hear that list of ‘one another’s again, and listen out for what we might need to do in response.
“Love one another, pray for one another, encourage one another, reproach one another, greet one another, serve one another, teach one another, accept one another, honour one another, bear one another’s burdens, forgive one another, submit to one another, be devoted to one another, laugh and cry with one another.”
So, do these ideas about how our relationships might be, within God’s family, make you excited or daunted? Maybe both!
Our Ephesians reading, about being strong in faith and knowing the hugeness of God’s love, TOGETHER as his people, ends with some wonderful encouragement.
St Paul says,
“[God] is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to his power that is at work within us!”
Living in the loving ‘one another’ relationships we’ve been thinking about this morning, is tremendous, and tremendously difficult. BUT God’s power – remember, the same power that raised Jesus from the dead! – is at work IN US, to do more than we can ask or imagine! How wonderful! It’s possible! God can do it! And so let’s pray...
posted by Parish Administrator at 8:03 pm
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